Kiss Kiss

by Billy Bob 'Launcher' Lary

I I thought that's what I've been tellin' ya all day. Now I need to come up with something that is really dumb, stupid or embarassing other than the REDMAN smoking thing.

Let's see... Oh yes, one day back in launcher land on ye ol' SSBN 626 Daniel Webster (my second boat, first one after having the sex change - TM to MT) I was just relieved of the Missile Compartment Roving Patrol (for those of you not in the know, that's basically a fire and security watch).

Well, I was havin' a good time cuttin' up with a few of the other guys when our AWEPS comes around tube #1 to the watch station, to check up on his guys (he was the Missile AWEPS).

A break in the story to let you know a little bit about Ltjg Queen (seriously); a very religious man (not saying this is or was a bad thing, just setting the stage), very intelligent, no nonsense, short (5'1") and of African American heritage (again, not saying this is or was a bad thing, just setting the stage). Me, 6'2", white, smart enough to tie my boon dockers, I believe in the Almighty and say my prayers, love to goof off and be a jokester, not yet married and like to have a good time (panty games anyone?).

OK, you got enuff of the picture for what happens next.

Mr. Queen walks up to the workbench and sez somethin' to the effect of ,

"How's it goin' guys?"

Everybody mumbles something incoherent, when suddenly something possesses me. I reach over, grab Mr. Ltjg 'No Nonsense short guy' and give him a lip lock. Not a little peck on the check or something dainty like that, NOOOO!!, it had to be a full blown, right on the lips, wet one. POW, KABOOM, WHOOSH!

He was gone.

Without so much as a 'I love ya' big guy'.

Well, the Chief was on watch up in control (COW I think), so Mr. Queen runs right up to him and tells on me, sorta like running to dad about stealing a comic book or something. MTC Singer calls back to the launcher operation station (LOS) to have a talk with me. He says,

"Lary, what the hell are you doing to Mr. Queen?"

I said,

"Nothing much, I just got off watch and kissed him good-nite."

The chief tells me he didn't like it and to stop pickin' on him. He said,

" I just got him trained, dammit! Don't go reverting back to TM and ruin him!"

I said okay, and ever since then, Ltjg Queen stayed clear of me when ever the chief wasn't around.

Oh, them was the days...

Billy Bob Lary .